Thursday, June 18, 2009

running out of time....

I only have 8 work days left for getting work stuff done; and if I calculate about how much free time outside of that to get personal things done, I have less then four days!!!

In some ways I want it to come quickly, and in other ways I wish it would slow down.

Monday, June 15, 2009


I hadn’t really had any expectations or plans for the weekend, it had been a difficult week and I was worn down enough that I hadn't given much thought to what the weekend would entail other then some effort at packing.

It started off a little tense on Friday night with a certain hockey game. Many thought it would go one way, but I believed it was possible it could go the way I was hoping; and lo and behold it did. (As Lance so eloquently texted) Da’ Gwinz!! Stanley Cup Champions!! This of course means Pittsburgh has two national champion sports team, and not many would consider me into that sort of thing, but I will love football because it is the Steelers and I will love the Penguins because they are hockey.

Later while taking the dog for a w-a-l-k [sic] after the game I had a “stoop-side” chat with Granpa Lee, our neighbor; which ended with an invitation to breakfast in the morning. I even managed to coerce HFG into this early morning outing! We each dined on waffles “because that’s all they have at that time”; although the gentleman had blueberries with his; like someone else I know. The adults had many cups of diner coffee as we enjoyed the food before us. We spoke of lives lived long ago and yesterday; of adventures to come, and the job at hand today. We touched on war and peace, rights, and responsibilities, Reagan and Obama.

Back home we said farewell to our friend and proceeded to watch Empire of the Sun. Something we’d been meaning to do, ever since we both became fascinated with a certain Christian Bale. We even enjoyed the appearance of Ben Stiller (another of our favorites) in this sprawling movie about a British boy during the Japanese invasion of Shanghai during WWII. Interestingly Lee, and both mine and Michael's grandfathers were enlisted man during the war.

Upon completion of the movie, I resigned myself to the packing which I had been dreading most... the packing of our framed family photographs (grandparents, mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, daughters, sons, of course little HFG and Poppy). In so doing I was given to examining them and the culmination of ours and other’s life decisions which had either reinforced someone’s expectations or rebelled against the choices others had made, including instances of my own. I didn’t get it all done in one day, but by Sunday night I only had a few frames yet to be boxed.

I suppose I dreaded it for nothing; although now my walls are bare and just like that it doesn’t feel like home to me. In a way having all those images conjure up understanding, faith, pride, strength, love... for me = home. In two weeks I will be homeless, but I know that when I need understanding I can call or text my friends… when I need faith I can pet my puppy dog, when I need pride I can look across at my husband, when I need strength I can feel it within my body which packed up all my belongings, and when I need love I can feel it in my heart… and as they say home is where the heart is… and sometimes it has to be packed up, wrapped in bubble wrap and safely tucked away.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

ask and ye shall receive...

there are boxes
and then there are boxes, and boxes and more boxes (and some bubble wrap too)!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

I'll get started on that after...

When Michael and I made the decision to move back east way back when (fall of 2008), I admit it was somewhat difficult to even fathom being where we are today, which is less then four weeks from getting on the road in a U-Haul filled with all our crap packed in boxes, no jobs, and no where to live.

Since then I've had little markers in my mind... once this happens I will do that, once these people know I will tell those people, etc, the most recent of "those things" being the brunch... which has since come and gone.

and now...

It's here, it's happening... I can pack anything and eventually will have to pack everything... I need to tie up any and all loose ends at work... there are people I wanted to see that I might not get to see... and in three and 1/2 weeks we will be climbing in the same said U-Haul filled with all our crap packed in boxes, no jobs, no where to live and nothing but endless possibilities ahead of us...

Monday, June 1, 2009

Not the first and not the last

I started out the weekend, truly saying goodbye to my teen daughter’s childhood, by way of her first semi-formal dance and looking very grown up. Then I picked up my friend Jill and off we went to Spencer’s small gathering of co-workers for his goodbye…

Saturday the only goodbye that was said was to our Costco (I don’t think we will be buying much in bulk prior to leaving in a month).

Then on Sunday was our big “goodbye” event: a potluck brunch. It was so lovely to see the many who came to remind us that we will always have a cheering section in Seattle. I would have liked to have a lil’ more time with each of the those who spent their Sunday morning with us, but I have fond memories of the moments we have already shared, and look forward to all the hellos we will have in the future. Same goes for those of you who were unable to come… trust me I understand… life is busy. I apologize for those invites I will decline in the coming days; I hope you too can understand.

and so it is... let the goodbyes begin:

Goodbye HFG's childhood, goodbye Spencer, goodbye Costco in Shoreline, goodbye coworkers of yesterday and today, goodbye last May 31st I will live in Seattle, goodbye first day of the last month I live in Seattle. goodbye.....